It’s completely normal to long for the picture-perfect relationship you see on social media. However, perfect doesn’t exist and aiming for it can lead to unrealistic expectations, ruminations, and even resentment.
Happy couples actually post less on social media, and they’re more likely to show emotional warmth in private, intimate ways.
Authenticity
Authenticity is a term that’s often used to describe someone who is true to themselves. Those who are considered authentic don’t let societal expectations or pressure to please others dictate their lives. They follow their own passions and aren’t afraid to make decisions that might not make others happy.
However, this isn’t to say that they’re never vulnerable or don’t care about others. Rather, they’re comfortable enough to allow themselves to be flawed and recognize that they’ll need to work on certain areas in their life.
Authenticity is an important aspect of emotional wellbeing, but it can be difficult to achieve. It involves identifying the factors that prevent you from being genuine and then overcoming those obstacles. This can include learning to manage your emotions and setting healthy boundaries with others. It can also involve being able to say no to people who demand your time and attention. It’s vital to prioritize self-care and learn to say no when necessary, even if it means disappointing others.
Honesty
Honesty is one of the most important virtues in relationships. It promotes trust, supports healthy relationships and contributes to well-functioning communities. However, honesty has fallen out of fashion in recent decades and is rarely discussed as an essential character strength.
When people are not honest, they can be harmful to their relationships. Dishonesty typically involves telling lies or misrepresenting the truth. For example, someone who falsifies academic grades is not being honest. Similarly, an athlete who knowingly uses a banned substance is not being honest.
Honesty is often difficult because it involves a level of self-reflection that not everyone is willing or able to engage in. Having a therapist who can help with this can make the process of becoming more honest easier and can also increase authenticity in relationships. A therapist can help couples determine what values they hold most dearly and explore barriers to honesty that may exist in their relationship. They can also provide a space to practice and develop honest communication.
Connections
While social media can be a fun way to share photos, it may not always be healthy. In fact, a recent survey conducted by Shot kit found that people who post couples content on their social media often misrepresent the state of their relationship. According to Bennett, the most filtered posts can actually have negative effects on your relationship.
These dyadic displays can send a message that the profile owner is committed to their partner and unlikely to be receptive to romantic advances from other people. It can also leave a romantic partner feeling left out or less special.
Furthermore, if your life revolves around sharing your relationship on social media, it can lead to an unhealthy focus on the needs of others. If you are constantly looking for likes and validation, it may be time to take a step back from your social media accounts. Instead, you can spend your time focusing on the needs of yourself and your partner.
Privacy
In many relationships, insecurities about commitment and intimacy surface when couples compare their relationship to others’ on social media. These insecurities may be triggered by seeing other couples posting about regular date nights or couples-only vacations. It’s important to talk openly with your partner about the impact of social media in your relationship and work together to establish boundaries that lead to emotional and commitment safety. There’s an old adage that suggests you should only post something online if it’s true, helpful, inspiring, and necessary, and that could help guide your social media habits.
In a time where our lives are so digitized, it’s important to remember that privacy still has value and that real people are behind every profile picture.